what’s on your ‘play’ list? - a mindful musing

Jun 26

Happy good day to your delightful spirit 💚

Today I’m curious about the role that play has in our lives. It’s an idea that keeps popping up in my sphere lately (which tells me something important!), and one that I’ve experienced a lot of struggle around in the last few years, particularly after becoming a parent (kind of funny, eh?).

I have a lot to say about the topic of play (and a lot of questions), but today I’m aiming to keep this short and focused on creating a springboard to elicit some reflection.

What is play?

💭 What are your thoughts?

I remember being in a workshop a few years ago and exclaiming (in utter despair) that I didn’t even know what fun was anymore. I was far too engrossed in the responsibilities of adulting and parenting and managing life, and I felt like those were all my plate had the capacity to hold.

A lot has changed since then, and I’ve put significantly more effort into living more joy-forward, but still I wonder what actually constitutes play.

Not everything that’s fun is play and not all things we label as ‘play’ are fun.

I play with my daughter frequently, but that’s not always ‘play’ for me. Sometimes it’s a lot of work.

Sometimes I think organizing my cabinets is fun, but that’s definitely not play.

❓ Is the approach what makes it play?

I don’t think. It’s a means to an end in that situation — a helpful approach, but not done for the experience of playing.

I think we tend to consider pure play as technically optional. A non-necessity from a productivity perspective. These are hotly debatable, but regardless, I think we play because it’s fun and engaging and quiets the mind (an interesting connection to last week’s Mindful Musing 🤔).

Scholarpedia spells out some solid attributes in the Definitions of Play entry:

Play Is Self-Chosen and Self-Directed
Play is intrinsically motivated—means are more valued than ends.
Play is guided by mental rules, but the rules leave room for creativity.
Play is imaginative.
Play is conducted in an alert, active, but relatively non-stressed frame of mind.

My takeaways:

Play isn’t something assigned by someone else. It should be something you’re interested in doing — guilt be damned.
Time and presence are the big deals when playing. Any outcomes are a bonus and not required.
Structure is cool, but rigidity zaps the fun.
Creativity needs a seat at the table. A big one. Make it a throne. Or one of those sweet papasan chairs from the 90s.
All of your other needs have to be met first. You need to feel safe and able to drop into the moment.

I create a good bit of my own struggle with this last one. I often feel guilty taking time to play or get so concerned with whatever is happening after the playtime, that I never fully engage in the play experience, essentially converting it to a chore.

I’m (of course) working on this, and this morning I started a ‘play’ list — things I already do that I consider pure play:

🚲 Riding my bike/scooter
🛼 Roller skating
🏓 Playing games
🎨 Art/whimsical project creations

Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like my list is dismally short, so I really want to invest energy into noticing what feels like play so I can intentionally grow this list.

What about you? What’s on your ‘play’ list?

I’d love if you’d share with me 💌 so we can learn from each other and expand our perspectives.

And expect future convos about play. I’ve got a lot more to say — and rhyme it may 🤷‍♀️

✨ May our spirits remain bright, our hearts tender, and our spines strong ✨

With good energy 💚